Please be Seated
Wednesday, September 12th, 2012SO Honda is pulling out of Formula One but why did it ever got involved in the first place?
Car makers lavish millions on GP teams in the hope that some of the dashing glamour of the pit lane will rub off on their products.
Please tell me how skimpy-topped grid tottie lines up alongside the Honda Jazz? This is the ultimate grey car. It is a motor that quickens pulses only in the Women’s Institute, where a Jensen Button is something you sew onto a cardie.
What is worrying is that a company with a bomb-proof customer base where redundancy comes in the shape of a coffin, should be feeling the icy blast of the economic nuclear winter.
Needless to say darling Darling is proving about as much use as a jar of Vaseline in a sandstorm.
Help the motor industry? You must be joking. Now if it were so much as a five-year-old’s piggy bank he would be all over it like egg on a tie.
Times are tough and friends are few, which means your next car has to offer a lot for little, return good MPG but not look like it has been styled by an environmentalist punishment squad.
I suggest a peek at the SEAT Leon Stylance 1.4-litre, a turbocharged five-door, six-speed hatchback costing £14,745 which offers adequate 9.8 seconds to 62mph performance, low taxation and 45mpg.
It is important to note that in most aspects the Leon will display typical VW group characteristics, solid build, fluent balance in corners and positive steering feedback.
What sets SEAT aside is its aspiration to be the Alfa Romeo of VW, while Audi is senior management and Skoda a couple of caravan enthusiasts from Bexhill called Norman and Brenda.
Squint at the Leon and it could be an Alfa, especially the rear lights and the hidden rear door handles. The difference is, however, that the interior has not been designed for some sort of driver deformity. There is loads of space, proper legroom and supportive SEATs, not rock carvings you would employ to toughen up a gladiator.
The Stylance is well equipped. Even the basic reference has air con, electric windows, trip computer and a CD player. To this the Stylance adds coming home lights, improved MP3 compatible sounds, repeater controls, tyre pressure monitoring, ESP, tinted windows and electric folding mirrors.
Not then, a bad car for the current climate. Cheap to run, good fun and a boost to the pan-European car industry as we tumble headlong towards a strip farming economy.
In fact there was little point in the stinkies breaking into Stansted. They might as well have stayed home with an organic spliff and a DVD of Watership Down. We are well on the way to bicycle utopia and it is only a matter of time before Stirling is replaced by dried peas.